Tuesday, November 11, 2008
i dont wanna see no doc
i basically feel like shit just about everyday. i feel like shit right now. sickly. weak. tired. nauseus. shaky. eating makes me feel like throwing up.
so yeah, i have a problem. ive talked about it with friends, ive tried to do some online research. i know i probably need to get a blood test done. if you know me you know ive been avoiding that for some reason. i was looking stuff up on wikipedia last night and omg i could have pancreatitis. my dads dad died from that! im sure im over reacting but really i'd like there to be some explanation for my shittyness. now, i smoke cigarettes. kind of. somedays i do and somedays i dont. and when i do smoke its only like 1-4 cigarettes a day. i know im not really addicted. ive smoked off and on for years so i know i can stop. over the past 2 months or so i've started smoking a little more than usual. last week i didnt smoke for about 3 days and although the idea of smoking crossed my mind a few times, it was really pretty easy for me to just not smoke. and amazingly i felt a lot better physically, even after only a couple of days. so! i am coming to the conclusion that its probably time for me to cut out cigarettes. for awhile at least. im going to finish the pack i have and then hopefully not buy another. pleasepleaseplease let this be a cure to my constant sickness.
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